How to Start Writing in Ten "Easy" Steps

1. Turn on computer.

2. Go to the kitchen for your beverage of choice. Return.

3. Open writing software.

4. Check email.

5. Remember the laundry hamper is overflowing. Get up to run a load. Return to computer.

6. Why is this keyboard so dusty? Pick out dust with pin. Retun pin to cushion.

7. The monitor is also a mess. Wipe with sleeve.

8. Beverage is now the wrong temperature. Head to kitchen to remedy the situation. Return.

Almost there...

9. Visit TV Tropes to look up literary elements. Lose three hours.

10. Begin writing.